{"product_id":"when-our-grown-kids-disappoint-us-letting-go-of-their-problems-loving-them-anyway-and-getting-on-with-our-lives","title":"When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us: Letting Go of Their Problems, Loving Them Anyway, and Getting on with Our Lives","description":"\u003ctable align=\"center\" border=\"0\" cellpadding=\"2\" cellspacing=\"0\" width=\"100%\"\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd class=\"productDetailSmallElements\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTable of Contents\u003c\/strong\u003e:\u003cbr\u003e\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tContents \n\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003e\u003ci\u003eIntroduction\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003eMay I Talk to You Privately? - Whose Story Is This? - When Bad Things Happen to Good Parents - Our Dirty Little Secret - The Elephant in the Parlor\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter One\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eThe Kids Are All Right and Other Lies Parents Tell About Their Grown Children\u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003eThe Most Privileged Generation in History -- Except Theirs - Great Expectations: Ours or Theirs - Who's in Trouble Here? - Making Them Happy Is Not Up to Us - But Can We Be Happy If They're Not?\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Two\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eWe're Waiting...and Waiting...and Waiting\u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003eWhen We Were Their Age - Prolonging the Search for Identity -- Or Just Avoiding It? - Excuse Us, But We're Having an Identity Crisis, Too - Our Other Unfinished Task - Two Kinds of Parents, Same Kind of Kids - In Whose Good Time? - Addicted, Depressed, and Dependent: A Detour or a Final Destination?\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Three\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eWhose Fault Is It, Anyway?\u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003eThe Two Myths of Parenthood - \"I'll Never Make the Mistakes My Parents Made\" - Wrestling Guilt to the Ground - The Echo of Our Childhoods - Regret Is Guilt Without the Neurosis - Why Wasn't I Listening? - When the Writing's on the Wall - Good Enough Is the Best We Can Do\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Four\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eThey're Ba-a-a-ck!\u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003eThe Never-Empty Nest - Out of Time and Out of Patience - Sparing the Help vs. Spoiling the Child - Lives Without Guideposts - Leaving No Forwarding Address\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Five\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eThe Challenge of Independence\u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003eStrangled by Our Purse Strings - \"Why Should They Wait Till We're Dead?\" - Codependent on Dr. Spock - Parents Who Give Too Much\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Six\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eMaybe We Shouldn't Have Inhaled\u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003eThe Perils of Nostalgia - It's Not the Age of Aquarius Any Longer - Is It a Symptom or a Disease? - Family Day at Rehab - Staying Out of Their Program - Doing the Wrong Thing\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Seven\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eThe Limits of Love\u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003ePaying a Different Kind of Attention - Denying the Undeniable - The Real Truth About Gay Pride - Following the Pied Piper - An Alternative to What? - Who Are the Victims Here? - Forgiving the Unforgivable\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Eight\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eSeparating from Their Problems Without Separating from Them\u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003eThe Key to Our Survival - Thank You for Sharing - Marriages Under Fire - Blurred Boundaries, Loving Limits - But What About the Grandchildren? - Phantom Guilt and Other Crimes of the Heart\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter Nine\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eReinventing Our Lives: \u003c\/b\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eThe Challenge of Postparenthood\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003eReinvigorating the Postparenthood Marriage - New Wine in Old Bottles - Different Times, Different Agendas - Shuffling the Deck for a New Deal\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eNotes\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eBibliography\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ci\u003e\u003cb\u003eIndex\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePublisher Marketing\u003c\/strong\u003e:\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cb\u003eHow do parents cope when their adult children struggle to launch, battle depression or addiction, or return home unable to face independence? With empathy and insight, \u003ci\u003eWhen Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us\u003c\/i\u003e confronts the painful gap between parental hopes and the reality of \"adultolescents\" who are stuck, struggling, or spiraling. \u003c\/b\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eIn this groundbreaking book, a social psychologist who's been chronicling the lives of American families for over two decades confronts our deepest concerns, including our silence and self-imposed sense of isolation, when our grown kids have failed to thrive. She listens to a generation that \"did everything right\" and expected its children to grow into happy, healthy, successful adults. But they haven't, at least, not yet--and meanwhile, we're letting their problems threaten our health, marriages, security, freedom, careers or retirement, and other family relationships. \n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e With warmth, empathy, and perspective, Dr. Adams offers a positive, life-affirming message to parents who are still trying to \"fix\" their adult children--Stop! She shows us how to separate from their problems without separating from them, and how to be a positive force in their lives while getting on with our own. As we navigate this critical passage in our second adulthood and their first, the bestselling author of \n\u003ci\u003eI'm Still Your Mother\u003c\/i\u003e reminds us that the pleasures and possibilities of postparenthood should not depend on how our kids turn out, but on how we do!\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\n\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eContributor Bio:\u003c\/strong\u003eAdams, Jane\u003cbr\u003e\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tJane Adams has spent over two decades researching and reporting on how Americans live, work, and love, and especially how they respond to social change. A frequent media commentator, she has appeared on every major radio and television program. The author of eight nonfiction books and three novels, she is a talented communicator, and an expert in managing personal, professional and family boundaries, dealing with grown children, coping with change, and balancing life and work. \n\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eA graduate of Smith College, Jane Adams holds a Ph.D. in social psychology and has studied at Seattle Institute of Psychoanalysis and the Washington, D.C. Psychoanalytic Foundation. She has been an award-winning journalist, a founding editor of the Seattle Weekly, and an adjunct professor at the University of Washington. She is the recipient of the Family Advocate of the Year award from \"Changes,\" an organization devoted to improving relationships between parents and adolescent children.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\n\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eAuthor:\u003c\/b\u003e Adams, Jane\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePublisher:\u003c\/b\u003e Free Press\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eBinding:\u003c\/b\u003e Paperback\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePub Date:\u003c\/b\u003e 2004-06-03\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eBISAC:\u003c\/b\u003e Family \u0026amp; Relationships \/ Parenting \/ Parent \u0026amp; Adult Child|Family \u0026amp; Relationships \/ Life Stages \/ Mid-Life|Self-Help \/ Emotions\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eWeight:\u003c\/b\u003e 0.45 lbs\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eISBN:\u003c\/b\u003e 9780743232814\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eASIN:\u003c\/b\u003e -\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eSKU:\u003c\/b\u003e SP-9780743232814\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Free Press","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":53033023930649,"sku":"SP-9780743232814","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0913\/0380\/5209\/files\/9780743232814_spiral.png?v=1787281562","url":"https:\/\/westbindery.com\/products\/when-our-grown-kids-disappoint-us-letting-go-of-their-problems-loving-them-anyway-and-getting-on-with-our-lives","provider":"West Bindery","version":"1.0","type":"link"}