Unmasking Narcissism: A Guide to Understanding the Narcissist in Your Life

Commendation Quotes:

This book helps the reader to see that through compassion, understanding, empathy, and limit setting, we can take steps to attain the lives and relationships that we deserve.

In working with clients on any topic its important to navigate between educating about the issue, teaching new skills to help resolve the discomfort of the situation, and reinforcing the clients ability to act and make successful change. In Unmasking Narcissism, Dr. Ettensohn has combined all three with a style, grace, and beauty that reflects his immense talent. Not only is his description of narcissism spot on, but he is able to provide analogies that represent and enhance understanding of the diagnosis that are often difficult to put into words. His compassion toward all parties involved in navigating the ups and downs of narcissism is a main step in helping each individual understand and cope with such a difficult situation.

Further, Dr. Ettensohn combines aspects or interventions from multiple theoretical backgrounds including ACT, CBT, Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, Psychodynamic, and Humanistic. This book is a wealth of information and should be read by everyone who has an interest in or who has a lived experience with a narcissistic individual. Dr. Ettensohn reminds us that at our core we are all human and react to fears of rejection and needs for intimacy in different ways. Chelsea Bagias, PsyD, Licensed Psychologist, Kaiser Permanente, Thought Disorder Team

Unlike most academic texts and self-help literature, this book does not label narcissistic individuals as evil, broken, or bad, and does not recommend triumphantly exposing them or diligently providing constant soothing and reassurance to protect their frailty. Also, Dr. Ettensohn does not depict individuals in relationships with narcissists as powerless victims or as needy collaborators. Rather, demonstrating the mindful, non-judgmental acceptance that he continually advocates, he describes narcissism as a developmental behavioral pattern, detailing its etiology, its trajectory, and its prognosis.

Using a clear yet vivid narrative, Dr. Ettensohn seamlessly introduces, explains, and interweaves core concepts in psychological wellness and effectiveness: attachment, assertiveness, emotional regulation, and boundaries. Of particular note, he discusses the under-looked aspect of vulnerable narcissism, which is common in psychiatric settings but difficult to recognize and treat. And most importantly, he firmly acknowledges the lack of control that we have over other people's behaviors, and emphasizes the importance of clearly communicating, setting and maintaining our own boundaries, and making conscious and responsive decisions that reflect our own values. Kilianne Kimball, Ph.D., Licensed Clinical Psychologist

I love this book. Dr. Ettensohn has masterfully translated his extensive knowledge and expertise into a compelling, easy-to-read guidebook for non-professionals. He exposes the often-misconceived underbelly of the narcissist, promoting a deeper understanding of both the person and the relationship at hand. He provides illuminating scenarios and helpful tips, allowing for more constructive possibility both within the relationship and within the reader s self. Unmasking Narcissism is a must read for anyone struggling to navigate this provocative and daunting relational experience. Nancy Kernick, Psy.D., Licensed Clinical Psychologist"

Dr. Ettensohn unmasks narcissism, not by villainizing, but by removing the barrier to understanding. He masterfully and compassionately fosters the reader's appreciation of factors contributing to the development and maintenance of narcissism, which then allows the development of empathy for the narcissist's experience. Such a shift in perspective helps the reader to find more flexible and workable ways to relate to a narcissist, whether that relationship be romantic, platonic or personal. This book is a valuable addition to any library. Robin Kirk, LMFT, Owner and Director, Sage Anxiety Treatment Program

This book helps the reader to see that through compassion, understanding, empathy, and limit setting, we can take steps to attain the lives and relationships that we deserve.

In working with clients on any topic its important to navigate between educating about the issue, teaching new skills to help resolve the discomfort of the situation, and reinforcing the clients ability to act and make successful change. In Unmasking Narcissism, Dr. Ettensohn has combined all three with a style, grace, and beauty that reflects his immense talent. Not only is his description of narcissism spot on, but he is able to provide analogies that represent and enhance understanding of the diagnosis that are often difficult to put into words. His compassion toward all parties involved in navigating the ups and downs of narcissism is a main step in helping each individual understand and cope with such a difficult situation.

Dr. Ettensohn combines aspects or interventions from multiple theoretical backgrounds including ACT, CBT, Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, Psychodynamic, and Humanistic. This book is a wealth of information and should be read by everyone who has an interest in or who has a lived experience with a narcissistic individual. Dr. Ettensohn reminds us that at our core we are all human and react to fears of rejection and needs for intimacy in different ways. Chelsea Bagias, Licensed Clinical Psychologist, Thought Disorder Specialist

Unlike most academic texts and self-help literature, this book does not label narcissistic individuals as evil, broken, or bad, and does not recommend triumphantly exposing them or diligently providing constant soothing and reassurance to protect their frailty. Also, Dr. Ettensohn does not depict individuals in relationships with narcissists as powerless victims or as needy collaborators. Rather, demonstrating the mindful, non-judgmental acceptance that he continually advocates, he describes narcissism as a developmental behavioral pattern, detailing its etiology, its trajectory, and its prognosis.

Using a clear yet vivid narrative, Dr. Ettensohn seamlessly introduces, explains, and interweaves core concepts in psychological wellness and effectiveness: attachment, assertiveness, emotional regulation, and boundaries. Of particular note, he discusses the under-looked aspect of vulnerable narcissism, which is common in psychiatric settings but difficult to recognize and treat. And most importantly, he firmly acknowledges the lack of control that we have over other people's behaviors, and emphasizes the importance of clearly communicating, setting and maintaining our own boundaries, and making conscious and responsive decisions that reflect our own values. Kilianne Kimball, Ph.D., Licensed Clinical Psychologist

I love this book. Dr. Ettensohn has masterfully translated his extensive knowledge and expertise into a compelling, easy-to-read guidebook for non-professionals. He exposes the often-misconceived underbelly of the narcissist, promoting a deeper understanding of both the person and the relationship at hand. He provides illuminating scenarios and helpful tips, allowing for more constructive possibility both within the relationship and within the reader s self. Unmasking Narcissism is a must read for anyone struggling to navigate this provocative and daunting relational experience. Nancy Kernick, Psy.D., Licensed Clinical Psychologist"

In working with clients on any topic it's important to navigate between educating about the issue, teaching new skills to help resolve the discomfort of the situation, and reinforcing the client's ability to act and make successful change. In Unmasking Narcissism, Dr. Ettensohn has combined all three with a style, grace, and beauty that reflects his immense talent. Not only is his description of narcissism spot on, but he is able to provide analogies that represent and enhance understanding of the diagnosis that are often difficult to put into words. His compassion toward all parties involved in navigating the ups and downs of narcissism is a main step in helping everyone understand and cope with such a difficult situation.

Dr. Ettensohn combines aspects or interventions from multiple theoretical backgrounds including ACT, CBT, Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, Psychodynamic, and Humanistic. This book is a wealth of information and should be read by everyone who has an interest in or who has a lived experience with a narcissistic individual. Dr. Ettensohn reminds us that at our core we are all human and react to fears of rejection and needs for intimacy in different ways." --Chelsea Bagias, Licensed Clinical Psychologist, Thought Disorder Specialist

Using a clear yet vivid narrative, Dr. Ettensohn seamlessly introduces, explains, and interweaves core concepts in psychological wellness and effectiveness: attachment, assertiveness, emotional regulation, and boundaries. Of particular note, he discusses the under looked aspect of vulnerable narcissism, which is common in psychiatric settings but difficult to recognize and treat. And most importantly, he firmly acknowledges the lack of control that we have over other people's behaviors, and emphasizes the importance of clearly communicating, setting, and maintaining our own boundaries, and making conscious and responsive decisions that reflect our own values." --Kilianne Kimball, Ph.D. Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Whether the narcissist in your life is a boss, coworker, relative, or romantic partner, the exercises and advice in Unmasking Narcissism will help you set healthy boundaries and make sense of this complex and often painful issue.

In this groundbreaking guide from clinical psychologist Mark Ettensohn, PsyD., you will gain insight into narcissistic behaviors, symptoms, and relationship dynamics. Dr. Ettensohn provides exercises designed to help you clarify your own values and goals for the relationship, whether that means immediate separation or long-term relationship management. Anyone whose life has been touched by narcissism will find this book helpful - whether you are coming to terms with a loved one's diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality disorder (NPD), or working to move forward after leaving a narcissistic relationship.

Unmasking Narcissism provides strategies and coping styles that will guide you toward a deeper understanding of both the narcissist and yourself, with:

• Easy-to-read sections aligned with the DSM-5 criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
• Explanations of both grandiose (overt) and vulnerable (covert) narcissism.
• Healing tools and techniques, including how to defuse arguments instead of fuel them, mindfulness meditation, and exploring vulnerability.
• Real-world stories of people coping with narcissists.

Throughout, Unmasking Narcissism offers a fully realized, yet compassionate portrait of narcissism that will help you on your path to healing without compromising your own mental health and wellness.

Contributor Bio:Ettensohn Psyd, Mark

Mark Ettensohn is a clinical psychologist in Sacramento, California. He specializes in treating narcissism and providing psychotherapy for chronic emotional, psychological, and relational distress. He has authored and contributed to several articles on narcissism for both the non-professional and medical communities. Learn more by visiting www.DrEttensohn.com.

Manhattan-based psychiatrist Jane Simon, M.D. is a graduate of Barnard College and Temple Medical School. The Huffington Post has syndicated her biweekly blog, www.drsimonsays.blogspot.com.